Concerts are some of the most peculiar events. If you’re like me you have been to a steady amount of musical shows, and have recognized the curious crowd that often assimilates.
I mean this in a good way, but sometimes it’s a struggle knowing whether to look at the actual performer or perhaps just the guy three rows up who is absolutely beside himself with enthusiasm for the music.
This is a beautiful thing to me, I love “that person” and sometimes I am “that person,” because I love music. From Garth Brooks to Coldplay, Mumford and Sons to Tomlin, I’ve seen them all!
All of them were unique, but the last concert I went to had me thinking. At one point I was sitting there next to my younger sister, and I kept hearing her giggle and burst into laughter. I looked over at her and I saw in her smile, her eyes and her posture; wonder. I was taken aback and immediately tried to snap some shots just for blackmail and whatnot. But something was going on in her heart that is difficult to describe, and is difficult to hold onto.
I didn’t see any adults enjoying the music like she was, in fact I wasn’t even enjoying the music with that kind of vibrance.
Kjirsten (my sister) was surprised because of the beauty that she saw. Her emotions were stirred in amazement.
Many of us have lost that as we live to eliminate surprise from our lives, hence the billion dollar industry of insurance. We do this with just cause because, in some form or fashion, we have all experienced surprise that could be labeled trauma. I’m not saying throw caution to the wind, I’m simply curious because we have missed multiple opportunities to experience wonder as a result of our need to be in “control.” Risk becomes even less of an option when you throw in fear of failure, however, often waiting beyond the risk… wonder! A sense of awe, completion, comfort, excitement, contentment, faith… wonder!
I am recently self-employed doing worship gigs around the state, and recording my first album. I didn’t want to do this because of my own fears, but the more I risk, even if it never ends up looking like what I dreamed it to be, the more wonder comes alive in me again.
I want to be like Kjirsten beaming with joy as I watch amazed at God’s faithfulness and surprised by the wonder of all that it entails.
In college, as for many, finding my faith was difficult. I pushed back against God full of fear, I was convinced he would leave, but he didn’t. I wrote a song about God’s faithfulness, You Are Faithful, which for me was an attempt to capture the ideas of wonder and grace. A wonder that could not be reproduced, or replicated by humanity, and grace regardless of my actions and failures.
Here are the words, I hope they speak to your heart and stir up some wonder at the beautiful rescue plan God has for our lives.
“With all the beauty that surrounds me
How did I ever doubt
And your spirit washes over me
You’re resurrecting my heart”
“Seasons of darkness through valleys low
Ever faithful are you Lord
Through Brokenness we rise
You’ve breathed in us new life
You are our hope”
“You are faithful you are True
Love relentless we run to you
Though I’ve wandered you’re my pursuit
I surrender this life to you”
I had to finish the song the bridge was simple…”our voices rise as one we sing to you,” but I needed one more verse it didn’t come until two days ago as I was getting ready to go shoot a video with THIS SONG. (Talk about stress!)
“Your grace brought me to my knees
This love is overtaking me
On Christ the solid rock I stand
I trust you’ll finish what you began”
This song is precious to me, it is the rawest testimony of God’s mercy and my reluctance to follow him, but it has also become a song to me that makes me smile with surprise at what God is capable of doing with broken people.
Thanks to my little sister for reminding me of the wonder.